Monday, May 03, 2010

A BIG TENT OF CRAZINESS

Hey, give right-wingers credit. They don't just offer one delusional, cockamamie theory regarding the Gulf oil spill -- they offer two.

You might already know about Limbaugh's theory that it was sabotage by environmentalists:

... Now, lest we forget, ladies and gentlemen, the carbon tax bill, cap and trade that was scheduled to be announced on Earth Day. I remember that. And then it was postponed for a couple of days later after Earth Day, and then of course immigration has now moved in front of it.

But this bill, the cap-and-trade bill, was strongly criticized by hardcore environmentalist wackos because it supposedly allowed more offshore drilling and nuclear plants, nuclear plant investment. So, since they're sending SWAT teams down there, folks, since they're sending SWAT teams to inspect the other rigs, what better way to head off more oil drilling, nuclear plants, than by blowing up a rig? I'm just noting the timing here.


(And there's more paranoia along those lines here.)

Well, in addition to that, there's a competing wingnut theory, from a fringe media outlet called The European Union Times. The EU Times, which regularly publishes stories such as "Obama Orders 1 Million Troops in Prep for US Civil War" and "Death Camps Warned Being Prepared As Millions In US Left Hopeless," now tells us that the Gulf spill was the result of North Korean sabotage (warning: noisy audio at link):

US Orders Blackout Over North Korean Torpedoing Of Gulf Of Mexico Oil Rig

...On the night of April 20th the North Korean Mini Submarine manned by ...
"suicidal" 17th Sniper Corps soldiers attacked the Deepwater Horizon with what are believed to be 2 incendiary torpedoes causing a massive explosion and resulting in 11 workers on this giant oil rig being killed outright. Barely 48 hours later, on April 22nd , this North Korean Mini Submarine committed its final atrocity by exploding itself directly beneath the Deepwater Horizon causing this $1 Billion oil rig to sink beneath the seas and marking 2010’s celebration of Earth Day with one of the largest environmental catastrophes our World has ever seen.

To the reason for North Korea attacking the Deepwater Horizon, these reports say, was to present US President Obama with an
"impossible dilemma" prior to the opening of the United Nations Review Conference of the Parties to the Treat on the Non-Proliferation of Nuclear Weapons (NPT) set to begin May 3rd in New York....

So I guess you have freedom of choice when it comes to which lunatic notion you believe ... that is, unless the two theories merge, which I suppose they will soon. Hey, I've got it -- remembers those reporters for Al Gore's TV channel who were captured by the North Koreans last year? They weren't captured at all! They were planning this oil rig attack all along -- on behalf of Al Gore! Al Gore's in cahoots with the North Koreans to shut down coastal oil drilling in order to destroy America! A CONSPIRACY SO VAST!!!!!1!1!!!!

Y'know, if I actually went to the wingnuttosphere and posted this theory in all apparent earnestness, I really think a hell of a lot of people would buy it. And that really scares me.

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